Communication Skills Examples

Category Archives: Communication Skills Examples

Leading Strategies Blog Featured on LeadershipDigital.com

February 28, 2011 admin

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Leadership Acumen

January 19, 2011 admin

What is leadership acumen? Leadership always yields tangible business results in the long-term. Since acumen is about insight and wise action, let’s consider it in context of great leadership and excellent business.

Insight

In many ways, leadership is about understanding self and others. A leader is not very effective at leading others without first leading self. Said another way, “Do as I say and not as I do” has fleeting success. What are some overlapping areas for leadership and business?

Fill Out the Team – A leader who is growing in understanding of self will know what type of people to add to the organization for a more complete team. All of us have strengths and weaknesses and bringing others in who have strengths not otherwise present in the existing group is essential for great leadership and measurable business outcomes. When looking for new team members, a leader will understand and consider a lot of personality traits, character attributes and leadership skills.
Watch for Falling Paradigms – A companion insight for excellent leadership acumen is recognizing the important role of mindsets. It is possible to force behavior changes for the short-term but this tension eventually resolves itself with a mindset change or someone leaving the organization. A sharp leader works to develop tools to help discover, look at and adjust personal as well as organizational mindsets. Only then, can behaviors change long-term with the resulting improvement in culture.
Demand Thinking – Leadership authority is not granted by a nameplate; formal power is – do not confuse the two. Leadership acumen demands innovative thinking be cultivated at all levels. This will require a measure of humility especially when a great idea comes from someone with a less-than-impressive title. (Here is an argument to reduce the use of titles but I digress.) The amount of decision-making authority to grant can be debated internally based on the desired culture but a healthy organization must have active thinkers with all their ideas popping out of the woodwork … consistently.
Allow for Mistakes – A culture that is a one-strike environment will clearly not inspire innovation. Self-awareness on mistake-mindsets will help the leader improve and then communicate this growth to others.

Wise Action

Assuming an organization is reasonably successful at fostering the preceding environment, what is the best way to sort through all the ideas and dialogue to take decisive action? While part of the answer is an art form, there are definite limits to consider. Here are three foundational ideas.

What is the intended, long-term destination of the organization (vision)?
Why does the company exist (mission, aim or purpose)?
How does enterprise intend to treat people inside and outside the organization (values)?

The answers to these guiding concepts should come through extended dialogue over months or even years. Part of the process of refining these overarching ideas thoughts will help make decisions on specific ideas in the environment. Everything must tie back to the vision, mission or values … hopefully to all three if possible.

Although a bit tongue-in-cheek, the next step is to simply make decisions. When a company is struggling, there is a tendency to slow or stop making conclusions. A certain amount of caution and analysis may be warranted if cash flow is tight but a leader must be careful to not stagnant out of fear. Procrastinate too much and your competition will eat your lunch.

One important measuring stick to help continue making decisions is the question, “What is the right thing to do?” Based on everything I know about our company, what is right? Listening to my conscience, what is right? What would those I most admire advise on what is right in this circumstance? What do others on the team think is right? The answer to “what is right” can vary depending on the environment but the discussion is healthy.

Build in whatever helps are necessary: write down the list of fears, form an informal advisory board (and use them), or specifically define what will happen with no decision. You can think of other ideas. Most of all, a leader must keep making intentional decisions … other people inside and outside the company depend on it. Anybody can make an easy decision; a leader will not run from the tough choices or allow other team members to shirk similar responsibilities in choosing. Remember, no decision is still a decision.

Results

Ultimately, results are what matter. Leadership acumen and process is great and informative but if it does not translate into action and measurable results, there is probably little linkage to business acumen. To repeat, true leadership acumen will link to tangible business results in the long-term. At times, this may take longer than the next quarterly earnings report but therein lies some of the art form: balancing the different time spectrums to have an organization that grows and produces at the same time.

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Advantages of Positive Thinking

December 18, 2010 admin

There is the classic question on whether the glass is half full or half empty. We could argue endlessly on a philosophical level about which outlook is more useful but let me make a practical argument for the-glass-is-half-full or the use of optimism.

The Christmas season reminds me of the power of optimism and how it can be a catalyst for other principles. (Principles meaning those things that are timeless, obvious and effective. Examples include respect, courage, consideration, service, excellence, etc.) Christmas is about new beginnings and how things can improve in amazing ways.

There are a lot of people hurting now with the sluggish economy. Layoffs continue and many are nervous about tomorrow. One of the necessary ingredients in prevailing over tough times is embracing optimism. This is not about escapism or denial; this about relentless perseverance and confidence that just happens to wear a smile (at least inside).

Optimism alone can fall short but, when used properly, can serve as a great driver. For example, when faced with a difficult problem – like job loss or other financial setback – the pessimist might be tempted to give up too soon. On the other hand, the optimist will actively engage in finding a solution over and over and not be put down by the first few failures. Some might argue optimism is soft but I suggest optimism is tough because it’s most needed when situations are the most difficult.

While upgrading to the F-15 from the F-4, I had some struggles learning how to fight with the new airplane. Because it was more capable than earlier fighters, it was important to maneuver differently to win. This required unlearning earlier lessons and learning new ones. During this time, optimism was one of things that kept me going. Even after failing two flights in a row (a big deal), I was committed to learning and was optimistic I would do so. Optimism was not the main or only ingredient but it was sure important. (I successfully upgraded by the way.)

The opposite holds as well. I worked with a man several years ago who was consistently pessimistic. No matter how I or others tried, there was no humoring his downcast outlook away. As a result, one of the hallmarks of his work was small or incomplete solutions. If you think you can’t or consider yourself unable, you are probably right.

Here are some application thoughts especially as we think about an approaching new year and the potential for greatness in each one of us.

Hold on to optimism like the treasure it is. Although incomplete by itself, optimism is of incredible value when combined with other principled actions.
Optimism is a great driver to reach better solutions. When faced with choosing between bad or worse, push back and look for good or great. Optimism helps keep the head clear for fresh possibilities. Don’t settle for “just OK” as this will likely turn into regret or at least disappointment later.
Optimism is practical. I must admit I have been skeptical at times of those who are overly optimistic. Just trying to “think” away a problem or challenge does not work. I was once lost in the woods and no amount of thinking (by itself) helped me find my way out. However, optimism combined with common sense action saved the day.
Optimism is a choice. Whether or not you feel naturally prone to optimism, this trait can be cultivated over time and become “natural.” Great people examples come to my mind and you likely have similar role models as well. Choose optimism and you will enjoy a great number of options across the board over time.

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The Importance of Trust

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So What Do You Think? (2 of 2)

November 27, 2010 admin

Last time, we started looking at counsel versus encouragement and how each has a role to play in a healthy environment whether at home or at work. Here is the continuation with specific steps to application.

1. Know the difference between counsel and encouragement. Counsel is the meeting of diverse paradigms which in turn urges the participants to explore underlying explanations. Encouragement is the alignment of two or more mental maps or the suspension of a mindset to give support. This may reinforce a learning point but will not foster as much growth as counsel.

Here are some questions to help. Am I looking more for an ally instead of improvement to a product, process or plan? Will I be overly shocked at a counter point or welcome the advice? Am I willing to allow someone else’s finger prints on my initiative?

If you want a yes-person’s comments, just ask for support, encouragement, or reassurance – not input. You will actually gain trust by being honest in your request. If you ask for input, be ready to hear disagreeing words and reward that behavior if you want such help in the future.

2. Seek counsel to grow as a leadership student. Engaging in genuine, open dialogue is a guaranteed way to uncover, look at, and improve paradigms. This in turn will ensure a broader perspective and continuous improvement as a learning leader. It is challenging to suspend assumptions to hear another point of view but the effort pays great dividends.

The aspiring leader’s goal should be to approximate reality as much as possible on any issue and this requires looking for different perspectives. Not all counsel will be useful but at least take it in and test by timeless principles. Here are two examples.

I once asked for and received input on a plan to streamline office processes. Several of us discussed this idea and it went a different direction than I had expected but it was better than my original idea. Upon presenting this plan to the wider audience in the office, one person said, “You will fail.” This set me back for a moment so I re-evaluated the process and plan. In fact, we had arrived at the solution properly and the so-called counsel was based on a person’s hidden agenda and not for the good of the organization. By the way … the initiative did not fail.

I worked with one team member who I could count on to call me on any dumb ideas. His style was to approach me one-on-one in my office and diplomatically but directly explain the short-sightedness of my plan. The first few times, I found the practice annoying but I quickly grew to value the advice as we improved team solutions based on these honest conversations. It also made his encouragement more important as I knew he was completely genuine in his support. I often think of this man’s example when needing to give honest feedback I know will cause controversy.

3. Let encouragement arrive unsolicited, if possible. The measure of humility is to allow encouragement to show up unexpectedly. It may be right at times to ask for support from a spouse or confidante but these instances should be the exception. If I need too much encouragement, there is probably an unmet need for approval that indicates a self-esteem problem. It may also reveal a love for status quo and this is the anathema to leadership. If I am producing leadership results in a principled environment, I will not lack for encouragement.

4. Give counsel based on conscience. This means carefully consider timing, issue significance, and openness of the hearer. This does not mean be timid about giving counsel but rather intentional. This is about being real and generating trust. The best counsel is given at least implicitly in context of the larger organization, whether it is a family, team, company or other organization. Counsel is about making the environment better. Counsel focuses on fostering positive, long-term results and is not beating someone over the head for sport.

5. Give encouragement only when you can do so genuinely. Given appropriately, specific encouragement will foster intrinsic motivation in others. Conversely, most people can smell flattery or fake praise and this approach will make future words less and less meaningful.

Encouragement and counsel both have a role to play in the leader’s toolbox. Just be certain to clearly understand each concept and know when and where to use properly.

Application: Value diversity in perspective.

Picture Credits

Flame-head and Bomb-head – Mark and Allegra on Flickr

Vegetable garden – Southern Foodways Alliance on Flickr

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November 20, 2010 admin

Modified excerpts from the book, “Expected End”

“You were in the wrong place at the wrong time,” the flight lead barked at me in the debriefing. Inside, I already knew this but how could I improve for the next time? Several of us had gone out on what was to have been a routine “Dart ride” where we live-fired the air-to-air gun against a towed target. My brain-fade this day was especially dangerous because of real bullets. As a new mission-ready pilot to the F-4, I was still adjusting to flying with a group of very experienced but non-instructor type of pilots. Still, by any standard, this flight had not gone well.

One of the basic skills required of a fighter pilot is to predict geometry and fly accordingly. I had calculated wrong and put myself in an unsafe position. The debriefing did not help much as it was long on my failings and short on fixes. However, what happened next was very useful.

After the debriefing, one of the experienced pilots took me aside and described what I had done, what I should have done, and, most importantly, why. The counsel of the more experienced pilot made sense although it clashed with my current mindset. I was then required to make a decision on whether or not to change how I saw the issues for improvement.

I finally decided the other pilot’s straight-forward explanation made great sense and tried it on the next Dart flight. It worked! Rather than being a hazard to the several other airplanes swirling in the sky, I was part of the team.

A few years later in an F-15, I finished a fight with a simulated tracking gun kill on the opponent. This is considered a macho way to take out a bad guy and made the many hours leading up to the moment all worthwhile. On this day in the debriefing, another experienced pilot was very complimentary of my contribution to the mission. The encouragement I received that day from the other pilot in the flight was very gratifying. I had produced a great result while honoring expectations and took a few moments to enjoy the fruits of learning.

There is a time for both counsel and encouragement. Counsel will likely produce a collision of paradigms. If the hearers are open to improvement, the counsel is put to good use to look at current mindsets and adjust as needed. If good counsel is rejected, growth will not happen.

In most learning environments, the conversations should be weighted to the counsel side but encouragement must not be neglected. Each of us has some need for recognition at least in some small way. If counsel is the main dish for improvement, encouragement is the spice that makes the meal taste so much better.

As an upgrading pilot moving from the F-4 to F-15, I had the chance to fly with an instructor who found a great balance of counsel and encouragement. He was very exacting in his expectations and there was nothing soft about his standards. On the other hand, he consistently pointed out successes in the building block flights that fueled my motivation exponentially.

One of the questions we ask in the military is, “Would I be willing to go with this person into combat?” The answer speaks volumes. In the case of this instructor, it would have been my honor to team up with him in combat.

Next time, I will suggest five concrete application steps for the leadership thinker.

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A Weblog · Critical Thinking Journals/Culture of Thinking – Critical Thinking Journals/Culture of Thinking. Thursday 8 March 2007 in Creativity, Critical Thinking, Education, Personal, Philosophy, Society by Josh | 2 comments. Well, last semester I kept a journal for my class CCT 602: Creative Thought. …

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Asking Great Questions

November 06, 2010 admin

One of the keys to becoming a highly effective leader is learning to ask great questions. By most definitions, a leader will need to become comfortable with a certain amount of ambiguity or fuzziness around the edges. This is because leadership is constantly evaluating whether the current mindset is correct

Leadership thinking goes beyond simply doing a good job or working really hard (although these traits are still required). Some have described leadership development as working on the soft skills and this is true in the sense that developing a person’s character and outlook is not so concrete as teaching someone to account for company expenses or repair a power tool.

Making improvements as a leader requires learning process skills. Most of us grow up and go out into a work world where we are given tasks to carry out. Once the task is complete, we move on to the next. Workers that grow up in organizational systems like this remain dependent on being told what to do and often do not cultivate leadership thinking tools. Carrying out essential tasks at all levels of family, group or organization is not bad … it’s necessary. It is also incomplete. At some point, the person who wants to become a leader must also work on new thinking skills.

Here’s an example. Managing could be compared to doing the very best “inside the box” or existing set of rules, policies and cultural norms. The manager in the strictest use of the word does not question the box. Instead, he or she works to maximize efficiency in the box. It’s like a gardener who must use an existing mower no matter how much it degrades over time without maintenance.

Leading, however, can be compared to looking for and deciding on which box to use. Too often, poor outcomes are not the result of bad people in the system as much as the natural result of a bad system. Thinking about the overall system and suggesting or causing change is the bread-and-butter of a leader. This is like a gardener who has full authority to buy a new mower when needed rather than trying to just get along with a sub-par machine.

So let’s talk about great questions. Advancing in this skill of questioning means growing in self-awareness, maturity, systems thinking and curiosity.

Self-Awareness

A leader’s journey begins and matures from the inside out. This is because it is very difficult to question an organizational outlook without doing so inside first. Said another way, changing inside will cause the person to influence change in the external world of work and family. For example, if I think a particular food tastes bad because it looks bad, I will have a hard time persuading others to try it. If I have tried the food and found it good, it is much more convincing to encourage someone else to try too.

Lesson – I must ask great questions of myself before I can do so of others.

Maturity

One of my favorite definitions of maturity is by Stephen Covey. He defines maturity as the balance of “courage and consideration.” (Covey, 1989) This means courage to say and do the right thing combined with consideration to do it in a kind way.

Lesson – Great questions require I ask hard things in a kind way.

Systems Thinking

Dr. Deming was an insightful teacher on systems thinking. One of his teaching tools was “The Red Bead” experiment.* Deming called this a silly game but he was passionate about the profound implications for the systems thinking student. A leader in search of a “new box” must first understand the entire existing box, not just a little piece of it. Misunderstanding the current paradigm means the would-be leadership student will likely make the problem worse rather than finding real, long-term solutions.

Lesson – Great questions come out of viewing the individual trees AND the forest at large.

Curiosity

I believe all of us are naturally curious from childhood. Often this curiosity is silenced as we grow and try to become more adult-like. In reality, curiosity is a critical skill for a leader. Without this tool, leadership growth is severely stunted or non-existent.

Innocent curiosity allows the so-called sophisticated to uncover new ways of thinking which lead to new and better ways of doing. I don’t know about you but every so often my children have asked very simple yet equally profound questions because they were just curious. How about re-discovering that skill for the good of your part of the world?

Lesson – There really are no dumb questions in the leadership quest. If you think it, ask it … in a nice way of course!

Now just imagine the great questions that can come out of self-awareness, maturity, systems thinking and curiosity! Give it a try!

Reference

Covey, Stephen R. (1989). 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. New York, NY. Fireside Publishers.

* www.RedBead.com

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4 Powerful Communication Strategies (2 of 2)

October 08, 2010 admin

Last time we looked at the first two of four effective strategies for effective communication. We defined effective strategy as an engaged, useful exchange of information. ‘Engaged’ is where two or more people are actively participating in the conversation through any means. ‘Useful’ is decided by the communicators, not by any observers.

We then went on to look at the first two of four key strategies. Here are the four.

Engage …

Compassionately
Logically
With Presence
Systematically

Now, let’s cover the last two strategies in detail along with some closing thoughts on methods and further application.

Engage With Presence

For more effective communication, here are two words of advice: ‘Be There.’ It is possible to be compassionate and logical and still miss the point. What is the meaning behind the meaning? What is the big picture? This is not trying to be deeply philosophical but about stand-out communication.

It is possible to care about the conversation and even have logical questions to ask and still have a wandering mind. It can be hard depending on what else is happening but effective communication demands … engagement! Engagement at its core is about being 100% in the discussion. Anything less needs work.

It can be harder to stay focused when the conversation is more important to the other person than to me so here is the pivotal question: Is this relationship important enough that I must genuinely engage even on a topic that is not as interesting to me as another? Think deeply about this from a values standpoint. Trust is never as good as when you need something from someone … later.

Engaging with presence includes the following.

Think ‘bigger’ than the conversation. What would a fly-on-the-wall view say about the exchange?
What are the hidden or implied meanings? What is unsaid but plain to a good observer?
Why are the other conversation participants discussing as they are and what do they need from me? How can I serve them?
How important is the relationship? If it’s important enough, banish all other brain-meanderings and focus on the topic at hand. If not, politely disengage for more pressing business.

Engage Systematically

One of the obstacles to effective communication is consistency. Most of us instinctively know how to communicate well in a one-time conversation but doing this day after day in good times and in bad is more difficult. What about the day you don’t feel so good? What about when you feel over-pressed with deadlines?

The intent of this section on engaging systematically is not to pretend any of us is perfect. Hopefully, the next several thoughts will encourage you to become even more effective in communication in a more consistent way.

Most of us already have the right intent; it’s just a matter of putting more effort in. We want to understand when we talk. We hope to have professional and personal relationships built on trust. (When I was a CFO several years ago, I would tell my staff that our most important commodity was credibility. That is another word for trust. This need is true regardless of the enterprise.)

The difficulty is life – whether at work or home – is not academic. It can be busy, chaotic, fluid, hard, confusing … and the list goes on. In short, there are many distractions to effective communication. (For example, a parent can understand how difficult it is to have an uninterrupted conversation with a spouse.)

The good news is it doesn’t take a lot of change to make a big difference in the consistency department. Engaging systematically requires a certain amount of discipline or – as the name implies – a system.

Here are few simple steps to application and you can think of more.

Send yourself a blind copy of an e-mail needing follow-up. Use a flagging system in Outlook or other software to revisit e-mails and follow-up. It is amazing how something as simple as, “Just checking in,” builds trust.
Have a way to write things down for follow-up. Always carry a small notebook or smart phone for notes.
Look at your list of key contacts and decide on an ideal schedule to visit in person or via video-teleconference (it’s free so no excuses). Schedule the visits. Keep the schedule at all costs!
Send someone a physical ‘Thank You’ card for an important contribution to a problem. This old method is new again.

Methods of Delivery

Before closing, let me focus a moment on methods of communication delivery. While the four strategies above are the foundation of great communication, the method of communication will definitely impact the effectiveness as well. Please factor this in when engaging compassionately, logically, with presence, and systematically.

There are certain types of communication that do just fine with e-mail (routine notes from a staff meeting for instance). There are others that will fail miserably (performance review – don’t laugh, it happens). A letter may work better for a resignation because it gives the sender a chance to refine thoughts and say everything just so. On the other hand, a letter is a lousy way to teach a new employee (don’t laugh, this gets done too).

There are certain places that work better for different types of in-person conversations. A public hallway might work fine for routine exchanges or planning. It’s a terrible place for talking about sensitive people issues. The corporate washroom might or might not be an OK place depending on its acoustics, ventilation ducts (someone hears in another room), and, most of all, the topic of conversation.

Here are questions to wrap up this article.

Engage compassionately: If I care, will I hold the conversation in this place and with this method?
Engage logically: How can I make our solution stronger?
Engage with presence: What is the whole message and what can I learn from the larger environment?
Engage systematically: How consistently am I applying the first three keys?

Effective communication is not only essential, it is critical for a group of any size to work well. Further, the business imperatives should be obvious that effective communication will help an organization learn, grow and thrive.

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October 01, 2010 admin

Communication is a topic with many writers and speakers. Most people probably have at least one opinion on what matters most with communication. Perhaps that is because communication is a necessary skill for anyone wanting positive relationships or to get something done with others. Often, problems of many varieties boil down to nothing more complicated than a lack of effective communication.

Effective Communication

What is effective communication? For our purposes, let’s define this concept as an engaged, useful exchange of information. ‘Engaged’ is where two or more people are actively participating in the conversation through any means. ‘Useful’ is decided by the communicators, not by any observers.

Communicating is as old as time itself. Because people are very complex, just words alone are only a part of any message. This is why in-person, verbal communication is the best setting and method for truly understanding the whole message. Because circumstances vary, the communication environments and methods of delivery directly impact the effectiveness of the message. More on that later.

If you want to excel in communication, here are four keys to success.

Engage …

Compassionately
Logically
With Presence
Systematically

Let’s explore each area in turn.

Engage Compassionately

Some might scoff at compassion in business but I would argue there are practical reasons for engaging with compassion – even in a business setting. This is not about being overly emotional. Effective communication by its very definition requires a certain level of care. Whether an organization is engaged in offering a product or service, great business results come from great communication.

For two-way communication, I must care about the message you are sending or I must put value on your advice on a common concern. Either way, I must care about what you bring to the conversation. This is compassion.

In a more practical way, how is this done? Here is an example.

A parent of a small toddler must care to communicate with this child. Often, a two or three-year old is not completely articulate. If that child starts feeling ill, it can be challenging to specifically discover what is wrong. If we look at this communication process as an observer, notice how the parent will ask several questions and perhaps even repeat some to fully understand the problem. The healthy parent doesn’t give up until there is an answer.

Now, take this same intent to the workplace or with personal relationships. The compassion that says I must ‘get’ your message and must be sure of it before we move forward is critical to effectiveness.

Here are concrete ways for engaging compassionately.

Ask as many questions as needed to understand. Do not put an artificial limit on the number of questions.
Check if this is the right time to engage on this particular topic. Based on the environment, would there be a better time or place? Depending on all the pressures in the setting, will this conversation likely move forward? It is better to delay than do a mediocre job of communicating.
Use active listening in a common sense way (no parroting). At reasonable points in the discussion, check understanding … in your own words. It is amazing how often two or more people can think they are communicating and they are unknowingly defining words differently.

Engage Logically

Oh, to have piercing logic that never wavers and makes even the most difficult decisions easy. Most of us do not suffer from such a problem but engaging logically helps improve communication. Just as it is essential to engage with compassion, it is just as important to engage logically. Why? The one-word answer is ‘DATA.’

I can feel a certain way about any topic but there is something uncompromising about having evidence. If I am discussing something at work or home and we are genuinely trying to find a solution, engaging logically will help. Logic will ask the hard questions. (Logic with compassion will ask them in a nice way.) Logic will probe and be curious.

Because we have already explored compassion, logic in this case is looking for the weakness in an argument to either strengthen the shortfall or find a better solution. In short, this is about effectiveness!

Here is the summary for engaging logically.

Be curious (not obnoxious).
In your own words, ask things like, ‘How is that statement possible? What sources support your solution or point of view?’
Question your own assumptions to see if they stand up.
Go wherever the questions lead. In other words, ask a logical question and then ask a logical follow-up question and so on. Think of this as scientific exploration.
If you think it, ask it!

Next time we will finish with engaging with presence, systematically and a few last thoughts on methods of communication. Take care!

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September 08, 2010 admin

The value of conflict is a controversial topic in many circles. Some organizations thrive on conflict for its own sake while others avoid conflict at any cost. Either extreme is dysfunctional as conflict can play a vital role in a healthy organization. The challenge is to focus, use and defuse conflict.

Focus

Focus requires commitment by the team to the larger purpose or goal. The first question a leader must ask in this situation is, “Can the purpose or goal be easily stated and understood?” If not, work until it is so.

Next, draw up ground rules to avoid making conflict personal and to stay on task toward the stated outcome. Typical rules include things like mutual respect, one person talks at a time, stay on task, honor those who are absent and so on. My personal favorite is “attack issues, not people.” The rules list should be a living document in that it can be added to or changed later as the team needs and wishes change.

As Chair of a 24-member, middle management, financial working group, I had the chance to take part in different degrees of conflict. As with any organization, there was never enough money to fund all the wants and, at times, the needs were funded at lower than ideal.

The continual challenge before us was to sort through posturing and over-inflated requests to manage the budget finances wisely and with fairness. Over time, we developed a set of rules and funding priorities that helped keep budget arguments on task and focused.

Use

After determining purpose and rules, it is time to move to application. DO NOT be intimidated by this next step. Venture in carefully but decisively and be true to the starting agreements above.

The ideal is to have a group that is self-regulating and continually aligning to goals and values (rules). If this is not possible, given the maturity or experience level of the group, hire a professional facilitator or appoint an internal gatekeeper.

If the facilitator is someone from inside the company, this person should be highly respected by the team and one who has a pattern of making sound judgment calls. This is not necessarily the boss and may even be someone from another department or division. The biggest role of the gatekeeper is to keep the process on track by moving toward the goal while honoring the rules with a firm yet considerate approach. (Yes, this is an art form at times.)

Defuse

Sometimes, despite the best of intentions, passions will swell and tempers flare. If the “discussion” remains focused on the goals and honors the rules, the gatekeeper should allow the conflict to continue. Any time talks become personal though, it is critical to stop and take a breather to allow emotions to settle.

Taking a break anywhere from a few minutes to a few hours or days can do wonders to not only put people in a more rational frame of mind but allow for processing opposing arguments and softening mindsets. Depending on the conflict, well-placed humor may be sufficient to relieve the tension. With more serious misunderstanding comes the need to actually separate for a time.

Persisting in conflict that has degenerated to a personal level of name-calling, posturing, and cynicism does more harm than good to the team. More importantly, this poor behavior, if left unchecked, will lower team output and hurt quality results.

Another benefit of taking a break is a chance for the gatekeeper or facilitator to quietly chat with any person that is either not participating or is inflaming passions on a personal level. This may also be a time to encourage a person who has shut down because of the intensity of the conflict. If the team interactions are staying on task but are passionate, some will find this environment too intimidating.

One- on-One or One-on-a-Few

So far we have talked mostly about teams working together to harness conflict for the betterment of the organization. But what about those inevitable times when conflict pops up between people or in small groups? Here are some thoughts.

Do not react to the emotion.
Work to find the issues that matter (Hint: It may not always be the first thing on the table.)
Brainstorm options and then narrow down to the best fit.
Stay locked on working to solutions; diagnosing is fine but do not spend time on blaming or other rabbit trails.

For example, while Budget Director, I once had a division head storm into my office and say, “Where is my $300,000?” He insinuated we had “stolen” the money for another division.

I could have become angry and emotional (very tempting) because this manager had the gall to question my integrity. I could have said something like he had no business making such accusations since we had been friends for years. Instead, I opted for the more difficult but useful course to immediately explore the issue and compare notes in a non-emotional way. The good news is we resolved the issue without any damage to trust.

Conflict is challenging even for the experienced but it has great potential to improve an organization if allowed to do so. The trick is to harness the raw energy of conflict and let it show underlying issues in the bright light of reality.

Summary

1. Establish an easily stated and understood purpose or goal.

2. Draw up ground rules at the first group session (change over time as needed).

3. Attack issues, not people.

4. If discussions are passionate but on task, allow to continue unless a participant obviously shuts down.

5. When things get personal, take a break of a few minutes, hours or days to let passions cool. Use well-placed humor if appropriate or use break time for individual discussions as required.

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Creative Problem Solving Techniques | BYU Training Connection – In circumstances where solutions to tough problems are more difficult to find, use creative problem solving methods like the following. Bring together people who have influence over your problem or are influenced by your problem. Try to include people with different experiences and expertise to maximize the diversity of ideas generated in the brainstorming session.

Does a Personal Brand Matter?

September 04, 2010 admin

Most people don’t wake up in the morning determined to make the worst of their day. I am convinced the majority do not start out the morning by plotting how many ways to mess up. Most people want to do well and enjoy life. Most people want to succeed. How that is done could be debated at length but the bottom line is … most of us want to do well.

But, it is the rare person who will consistently do well by accident. And even if such an amazing accident happens, there is case after case of how this does not last. A person with a natural talent who does not better the talent will fall far short of potential success. (Remember Mom and Dad reminding you to practice? This principle still applies in adulthood.) Someone who can easily start a good thing will not follow through because of stunted personal growth. This is why building a personal brand matters.

For example, if someone cannot manage personal finances before winning the lottery, it is a safe bet that same person will do no better after hitting the jackpot. In this case, having bundles of money does not improve the ability to manage the money. Hopefully, it is easy to see in this case how one incredible event does not change the existing package (the undeveloped financial skill). (By the way … I do not advocate spending your money on the lottery.)

Here’s another example. In today’s very competitive job market, it takes more than the usual abilities to stand out and be hired, retained, or promoted. There are a bunch of folks out there who have the basic skills for your job. They can type, file, follow policy, say “thank you,” answer the phone and all the other typical things a company might want. But do they stand out? Do you stand out?

Not to be ego-driven but what is your competitive advantage over the other people you meet? What is your unique value-added? How well do you get along with others? If you don’t know your unique contribution or don’t think you have anything special to offer, please, please think again! Look deep inside with the most objective thoughts you can muster. The good stuff is there … you just have to discover it! This is all part of building a signature brand.

Building a signature brand of excellence has very tangible, measurable, concrete results. Whether it’s getting a better job in a tough market or gaining a promotion or developing a new, innovative program so your organization does better financially, the results always follow the person who will intentionally and carefully build a consistent personal brand that generates trust.

There is a lot of good in the saying, “Live life on purpose.” There is something very satisfying about being intentional even if it gives mixed results at first. The good consequences will happen over time. Just remember to measure the results against the medium-to-long term as well as the immediate.

So really the question should not be, “Does a personal brand matter?” but rather, “Do I want to be excellent”? If the answer is “YES” then building a personal brand is a no-brainer!

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