Tag Archives: natural insight

So What Do You Think? (2 of 2)

November 27, 2010   admin
Photo by Wiertz Sébastien

Last time, we started looking at counsel versus encouragement and how each has a role to play in a healthy environment whether at home or at work. Here is the continuation with specific steps to application.

1. Know the difference between counsel and encouragement. Counsel is the meeting of diverse paradigms which in turn urges the participants to explore underlying explanations. Encouragement is the alignment of two or more mental maps or the suspension of a mindset to give support. This may reinforce a learning point but will not foster as much growth as counsel.

Here are some questions to help. Am I looking more for an ally instead of improvement to a product, process or plan? Will I be overly shocked at a counter point or welcome the advice? Am I willing to allow someone else’s finger prints on my initiative?

If you want a yes-person’s comments, just ask for support, encouragement, or reassurance – not input. You will actually gain trust by being honest in your request. If you ask for input, be ready to hear disagreeing words and reward that behavior if you want such help in the future.

2. Seek counsel to grow as a leadership student. Engaging in genuine, open dialogue is a guaranteed way to uncover, look at, and improve paradigms. This in turn will ensure a broader perspective and continuous improvement as a learning leader. It is challenging to suspend assumptions to hear another point of view but the effort pays great dividends.

The aspiring leader’s goal should be to approximate reality as much as possible on any issue and this requires looking for different perspectives. Not all counsel will be useful but at least take it in and test by timeless principles. Here are two examples.

I once asked for and received input on a plan to streamline office processes. Several of us discussed this idea and it went a different direction than I had expected but it was better than my original idea. Upon presenting this plan to the wider audience in the office, one person said, “You will fail.” This set me back for a moment so I re-evaluated the process and plan. In fact, we had arrived at the solution properly and the so-called counsel was based on a person’s hidden agenda and not for the good of the organization. By the way … the initiative did not fail.

I worked with one team member who I could count on to call me on any dumb ideas. His style was to approach me one-on-one in my office and diplomatically but directly explain the short-sightedness of my plan. The first few times, I found the practice annoying but I quickly grew to value the advice as we improved team solutions based on these honest conversations. It also made his encouragement more important as I knew he was completely genuine in his support. I often think of this man’s example when needing to give honest feedback I know will cause controversy.

3. Let encouragement arrive unsolicited, if possible. The measure of humility is to allow encouragement to show up unexpectedly. It may be right at times to ask for support from a spouse or confidante but these instances should be the exception. If I need too much encouragement, there is probably an unmet need for approval that indicates a self-esteem problem. It may also reveal a love for status quo and this is the anathema to leadership. If I am producing leadership results in a principled environment, I will not lack for encouragement.

4. Give counsel based on conscience. This means carefully consider timing, issue significance, and openness of the hearer. This does not mean be timid about giving counsel but rather intentional. This is about being real and generating trust. The best counsel is given at least implicitly in context of the larger organization, whether it is a family, team, company or other organization. Counsel is about making the environment better. Counsel focuses on fostering positive, long-term results and is not beating someone over the head for sport.

5. Give encouragement only when you can do so genuinely. Given appropriately, specific encouragement will foster intrinsic motivation in others. Conversely, most people can smell flattery or fake praise and this approach will make future words less and less meaningful.

Encouragement and counsel both have a role to play in the leader’s toolbox. Just be certain to clearly understand each concept and know when and where to use properly.

Application: Value diversity in perspective.

Picture Credits

Flame-head and Bomb-head – Mark and Allegra on Flickr

Vegetable garden – Southern Foodways Alliance on Flickr

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So What Do You Think? (1 of 2)

November 20, 2010   admin
Photo by Wiertz Sébastien

Modified excerpts from the book, “Expected End”

“You were in the wrong place at the wrong time,” the flight lead barked at me in the debriefing. Inside, I already knew this but how could I improve for the next time? Several of us had gone out on what was to have been a routine “Dart ride” where we live-fired the air-to-air gun against a towed target. My brain-fade this day was especially dangerous because of real bullets. As a new mission-ready pilot to the F-4, I was still adjusting to flying with a group of very experienced but non-instructor type of pilots. Still, by any standard, this flight had not gone well.

One of the basic skills required of a fighter pilot is to predict geometry and fly accordingly. I had calculated wrong and put myself in an unsafe position. The debriefing did not help much as it was long on my failings and short on fixes. However, what happened next was very useful.

After the debriefing, one of the experienced pilots took me aside and described what I had done, what I should have done, and, most importantly, why. The counsel of the more experienced pilot made sense although it clashed with my current mindset. I was then required to make a decision on whether or not to change how I saw the issues for improvement.

I finally decided the other pilot’s straight-forward explanation made great sense and tried it on the next Dart flight. It worked! Rather than being a hazard to the several other airplanes swirling in the sky, I was part of the team.

A few years later in an F-15, I finished a fight with a simulated tracking gun kill on the opponent. This is considered a macho way to take out a bad guy and made the many hours leading up to the moment all worthwhile. On this day in the debriefing, another experienced pilot was very complimentary of my contribution to the mission. The encouragement I received that day from the other pilot in the flight was very gratifying. I had produced a great result while honoring expectations and took a few moments to enjoy the fruits of learning.

There is a time for both counsel and encouragement. Counsel will likely produce a collision of paradigms. If the hearers are open to improvement, the counsel is put to good use to look at current mindsets and adjust as needed. If good counsel is rejected, growth will not happen.

In most learning environments, the conversations should be weighted to the counsel side but encouragement must not be neglected. Each of us has some need for recognition at least in some small way. If counsel is the main dish for improvement, encouragement is the spice that makes the meal taste so much better.

As an upgrading pilot moving from the F-4 to F-15, I had the chance to fly with an instructor who found a great balance of counsel and encouragement. He was very exacting in his expectations and there was nothing soft about his standards. On the other hand, he consistently pointed out successes in the building block flights that fueled my motivation exponentially.

One of the questions we ask in the military is, “Would I be willing to go with this person into combat?” The answer speaks volumes. In the case of this instructor, it would have been my honor to team up with him in combat.

Next time, I will suggest five concrete application steps for the leadership thinker.

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4 Powerful Communication Strategies (2 of 2)

October 08, 2010   admin

Last time we looked at the first two of four effective strategies for effective communication. We defined effective strategy as an engaged, useful exchange of information. ‘Engaged’ is where two or more people are actively participating in the conversation through any means. ‘Useful’ is decided by the communicators, not by any observers.

We then went on to look at the first two of four key strategies. Here are the four.

Engage …

  • Compassionately
  • Logically
  • With Presence
  • Systematically

Now, let’s cover the last two strategies in detail along with some closing thoughts on methods and further application.

Engage With Presence

For more effective communication, here are two words of advice: ‘Be There.’ It is possible to be compassionate and logical and still miss the point. What is the meaning behind the meaning? What is the big picture? This is not trying to be deeply philosophical but about stand-out communication.

It is possible to care about the conversation and even have logical questions to ask and still have a wandering mind. It can be hard depending on what else is happening but effective communication demands … engagement! Engagement at its core is about being 100% in the discussion. Anything less needs work.

It can be harder to stay focused when the conversation is more important to the other person than to me so here is the pivotal question: Is this relationship important enough that I must genuinely engage even on a topic that is not as interesting to me as another? Think deeply about this from a values standpoint. Trust is never as good as when you need something from someone … later.

Engaging with presence includes the following.

  • Think ‘bigger’ than the conversation. What would a fly-on-the-wall view say about the exchange?
  • What are the hidden or implied meanings? What is unsaid but plain to a good observer?
  • Why are the other conversation participants discussing as they are and what do they need from me? How can I serve them?
  • How important is the relationship? If it’s important enough, banish all other brain-meanderings and focus on the topic at hand. If not, politely disengage for more pressing business.

Engage Systematically

One of the obstacles to effective communication is consistency. Most of us instinctively know how to communicate well in a one-time conversation but doing this day after day in good times and in bad is more difficult. What about the day you don’t feel so good? What about when you feel over-pressed with deadlines?

The intent of this section on engaging systematically is not to pretend any of us is perfect. Hopefully, the next several thoughts will encourage you to become even more effective in communication in a more consistent way.

Most of us already have the right intent; it’s just a matter of putting more effort in. We want to understand when we talk. We hope to have professional and personal relationships built on trust. (When I was a CFO several years ago, I would tell my staff that our most important commodity was credibility. That is another word for trust. This need is true regardless of the enterprise.)

The difficulty is life – whether at work or home – is not academic. It can be busy, chaotic, fluid, hard, confusing … and the list goes on. In short, there are many distractions to effective communication. (For example, a parent can understand how difficult it is to have an uninterrupted conversation with a spouse.)

The good news is it doesn’t take a lot of change to make a big difference in the consistency department. Engaging systematically requires a certain amount of discipline or – as the name implies – a system.

Here are few simple steps to application and you can think of more.

  • Send yourself a blind copy of an e-mail needing follow-up. Use a flagging system in Outlook or other software to revisit e-mails and follow-up. It is amazing how something as simple as, “Just checking in,” builds trust.
  • Have a way to write things down for follow-up. Always carry a small notebook or smart phone for notes.
  • Look at your list of key contacts and decide on an ideal schedule to visit in person or via video-teleconference (it’s free so no excuses). Schedule the visits. Keep the schedule at all costs!
  • Send someone a physical ‘Thank You’ card for an important contribution to a problem. This old method is new again.

Methods of Delivery

Before closing, let me focus a moment on methods of communication delivery. While the four strategies above are the foundation of great communication, the method of communication will definitely impact the effectiveness as well. Please factor this in when engaging compassionately, logically, with presence, and systematically.

There are certain types of communication that do just fine with e-mail (routine notes from a staff meeting for instance). There are others that will fail miserably (performance review – don’t laugh, it happens). A letter may work better for a resignation because it gives the sender a chance to refine thoughts and say everything just so. On the other hand, a letter is a lousy way to teach a new employee (don’t laugh, this gets done too).

There are certain places that work better for different types of in-person conversations. A public hallway might work fine for routine exchanges or planning. It’s a terrible place for talking about sensitive people issues. The corporate washroom might or might not be an OK place depending on its acoustics, ventilation ducts (someone hears in another room), and, most of all, the topic of conversation.

Here are questions to wrap up this article.

  1. Engage compassionately: If I care, will I hold the conversation in this place and with this method?
  2. Engage logically: How can I make our solution stronger?
  3. Engage with presence: What is the whole message and what can I learn from the larger environment?
  4. Engage systematically: How consistently am I applying the first three keys?

Effective communication is not only essential, it is critical for a group of any size to work well. Further, the business imperatives should be obvious that effective communication will help an organization learn, grow and thrive.

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October 01, 2010   admin

Communication is a topic with many writers and speakers. Most people probably have at least one opinion on what matters most with communication. Perhaps that is because communication is a necessary skill for anyone wanting positive relationships or to get something done with others. Often, problems of many varieties boil down to nothing more complicated than a lack of effective communication.

Effective Communication

What is effective communication? For our purposes, let’s define this concept as an engaged, useful exchange of information. ‘Engaged’ is where two or more people are actively participating in the conversation through any means. ‘Useful’ is decided by the communicators, not by any observers.

Communicating is as old as time itself. Because people are very complex, just words alone are only a part of any message. This is why in-person, verbal communication is the best setting and method for truly understanding the whole message. Because circumstances vary, the communication environments and methods of delivery directly impact the effectiveness of the message. More on that later.

If you want to excel in communication, here are four keys to success.

Engage …

  • Compassionately
  • Logically
  • With Presence
  • Systematically

Let’s explore each area in turn.

Engage Compassionately

Some might scoff at compassion in business but I would argue there are practical reasons for engaging with compassion – even in a business setting. This is not about being overly emotional. Effective communication by its very definition requires a certain level of care. Whether an organization is engaged in offering a product or service, great business results come from great communication.

For two-way communication, I must care about the message you are sending or I must put value on your advice on a common concern. Either way, I must care about what you bring to the conversation. This is compassion.

In a more practical way, how is this done? Here is an example.

A parent of a small toddler must care to communicate with this child. Often, a two or three-year old is not completely articulate. If that child starts feeling ill, it can be challenging to specifically discover what is wrong. If we look at this communication process as an observer, notice how the parent will ask several questions and perhaps even repeat some to fully understand the problem. The healthy parent doesn’t give up until there is an answer.

Now, take this same intent to the workplace or with personal relationships. The compassion that says I must ‘get’ your message and must be sure of it before we move forward is critical to effectiveness.

Here are concrete ways for engaging compassionately.

  • Ask as many questions as needed to understand. Do not put an artificial limit on the number of questions.
  • Check if this is the right time to engage on this particular topic. Based on the environment, would there be a better time or place? Depending on all the pressures in the setting, will this conversation likely move forward? It is better to delay than do a mediocre job of communicating.
  • Use active listening in a common sense way (no parroting). At reasonable points in the discussion, check understanding … in your own words. It is amazing how often two or more people can think they are communicating and they are unknowingly defining words differently.

Engage Logically

Oh, to have piercing logic that never wavers and makes even the most difficult decisions easy. Most of us do not suffer from such a problem but engaging logically helps improve communication. Just as it is essential to engage with compassion, it is just as important to engage logically. Why? The one-word answer is ‘DATA.’

I can feel a certain way about any topic but there is something uncompromising about having evidence. If I am discussing something at work or home and we are genuinely trying to find a solution, engaging logically will help. Logic will ask the hard questions. (Logic with compassion will ask them in a nice way.) Logic will probe and be curious.

Because we have already explored compassion, logic in this case is looking for the weakness in an argument to either strengthen the shortfall or find a better solution. In short, this is about effectiveness!

Here is the summary for engaging logically.

  • Be curious (not obnoxious).
  • In your own words, ask things like, ‘How is that statement possible? What sources support your solution or point of view?’
  • Question your own assumptions to see if they stand up.
  • Go wherever the questions lead. In other words, ask a logical question and then ask a logical follow-up question and so on. Think of this as scientific exploration.
  • If you think it, ask it!

Next time we will finish with engaging with presence, systematically and a few last thoughts on methods of communication. Take care!

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Focused Creativity

August 10, 2010   admin
Photo by opensourceway

Last time, we looked at creativity in general and how each person naturally possesses a certain amount of this trait. This week, let’s consider how to use creativity as a business tool.

Unfettered creativity and curiosity can be fun but it also can be chaotic. While businesses need to create to thrive long-term, they also need to operate consistently to get to the long-term. This creates tension: stability versus adaptability, status quo versus innovation. Either side of the spectrum need not exclude the other. In fact, the healthiest organizations look for the most holistic solutions possible.

In order to achieve focused creativity in a business, the team must first understand the true aim of the organization. This may or may not align with the nice plaque on your lobby wall. Franklin Covey put out a video a few years ago titled, “Max and Max.” (ATS Media)  The pretend company in the presentation thought they enshrined the motto of “Service, Service, Service.” However, when it came to making decisions, the core mission should have read, “We Follow Policy, No Matter What.” The best day was capturing a sale and so-called customer service went downhill from there. This over-reliance on static policy rules stifled creativity and good customer care.

Again, rules and policy are necessary for an organization to operate reasonably well in the short-term; creativity is needed for the long-term health of the enterprise. Here are ways to find the “and” solution of creativity and stable operations.

Bosses

  1. How much decision making ability do you give your front-line workers? Do you stretch your comfort zone on this to create a business environment with focused creativity?
  1. How much tolerance do you have for well-intentioned mistakes? Do you treat these types of errors as the tuition of developing a high performance employee? Do you coach employees on how to better put decisions in the context of the organization’s core purpose (not just one of the rules)?
  1. Rules and policies should have a finite shelf-life. Do you routinely review (or better yet, have the newest employee review) and recommend changes and deletions?

Non-bosses

  1. Do you ever spend the last few minutes of your lunch hour daydreaming about how you could make your work place better? What are the things in your control to influence? What small things would make a big difference?
  1. If you are a valued worker, you probably have more influence with your boss than you think. If you have a creative idea, how will it benefit the business’ bottom line? What is the return on investment? How will this idea help the company long-term? Are you willing to make a reasoned business case for you latest brainstorm?
  1. If you were the boss and could change one thing (highest leverage), what would it be? Now back to reality … can you do things incrementally to move toward this important “one thing” over time?

Reference

ATS Media. Retrieved July 19, 2010. http://www.atsmedia.com/productancillary/MAX-22_LG.pdf

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How to Benefit From Your Natural Creativity

August 10, 2010   admin
Photo by opensourceway

You are creative! It is not a question of “if;” it is a question of “how much!” Each person is blessed with creativity from birth and so it is a matter of learning how to express this gift. Think about how a group of young children just ooze with creativity and energy. Problems are not nearly so daunting to the youngsters as they might be to us adults. What can we learn?

I recently watched a creative video on “The Marshmallow Challenge.”* One of the interesting points in this video was how kindergarten students perform significantly better than business school students on building the tallest tower made only from 20 sticks of uncooked spaghetti, one yard of tape, one yard of string, and one marshmallow (which must go on top)! The good news is, with some work, all the older groups improve noticeably as they practice thinking and building more creatively in this marshmallow exercise.

It is as though the creative and curious part of us becomes less useful, as we move into the work world. This is a sad fact and hurts the productivity of organizations worldwide. While a healthy organization needs to have both stability and creativity, lack of status quo is usually not the problem. This is often because creativity is not rewarded enough.

While I do not want to get you into too much trouble at work, here are some thoughts on re-capturing the child-like enjoyment of creativity.

  1. When you get dressed tomorrow morning, use a different routine. Put your pants on starting with the other leg first. Put your shirt on starting with a different arms. If you normally start by choosing the outfit, choose an accessory first. Dress in a different room. What do you notice about your surroundings and actions?
  2. Drive to work or to your errands by a different route than you normally take. Make sure and allow extra time so you are not late. I am not suggesting you try to get lost although that can be a creative exercise all its own. Stop by the side of the road and look at an especially beautiful orchard, house, park, etc. What are your theories about the builder or creater? How you can you use this in your everyday world?
  3. Check out a book from the library on a topic you do not usually explore. What can you learn from an unfamiliar subject that will foster curiosity in your more familiar surroundings?
  4. Play an I-Spy game with a young child. Ask questions of a child about their world?
  5. What ideas can you brainstorm in the search of greater creativity?

Your family, friends and work will all benefit from this newfound desire to be creative and curious. Take care.

* – For more details, please see http://www.MarshmallowChallenge.com.

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