Let’s continue from last time by looking at a book by New Orleans Saints Quarterback, Drew Brees titled, “Coming Back Stronger.” (If you are challenged with your present circumstances, let me recommend Drew’s book to you.) You may recall that in this book, Drew talks about the mysterious value of adversity and how, “that which doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.” (Brees, 2010) He draws from his real life examples and suggests ways of finding the good in bad things that may come from just living life.

One of the intriguing concepts in the book relates to Drew’s acrostic on faith. ‘Keeping the faith’ so to speak is one of the required mental processes to excel in adversity. From a team perspective, Drew breaks down faith into five pieces so here is the diagram.

Fortitude

Attitude

Integrity

Trust

Humility

We will look at the final parts this time by combining thoughts from the book with my editorial comments.

Trust

Trust (or the lack thereof) is the natural outcome of integrity. If you want more trust in a relationship – be it personal or professional – work on integrity first. Don’t just try to force trust (it doesn’t work anyway). Trust is the glue that holds any group or organization together. Without trust, any team or family will fall apart because each member becomes an island.

In the book, “Expected End,” I call trust as one of the two super-principles. (Friesen, 2008) Any successful group excels because of cultivated trust. At the most basic level, I have to believe in you to some degree (and vice versa) in order for us to perform our respective team tasks together with excellence.

I can think of no better example than formation flying. The flight lead (#1 airplane) has certain duties and responsibilities as does the wingman (#2 airplane). Over time, as pilots fly with other pilots, they develop different amounts of trust based on how each performs their respective duties. In the fighter world, a high-trust formation is an incredible weapon. The opposite is true as well.

Ideas – How much do others trust me? Do I hang out with people I trust? What one relationship can I work on this week to improve trust by being a person of better integrity?

Humility

The second of two ‘super-principles’ is humility. (Friesen, 2008) Humility is so very powerful because is allows learning to happen. After all, as one great coach said (can’t remember his name), “None of us knows everything about anything.”

Let’s get one thing straight … humility is not weak! Humility is a practical view of life and does not over-value self. Yes, self-esteem is important and humility does not harm self-esteem. Humility keeps that big ego in check.

You may argue that you have not ego but I think most of us do to some extent. Ego is not bad as long as it is kept in check by humility. Ego can help people do great things. Ego can help a person persist in spite of adversity. Mis-guided ego can destroy relationships, however.

Humility recognizes I do not have all the best ideas or infallible perspective. Humility looks for insight from others and then genuinely considers this advice. The beauty of humility is it helps any willing participant gain mindsets that are closer to reality and isn’t that what we really all aspire to? Don’t we just want to right in the most objective way?

Ideas – With whom should I suspend judgment the next time this person gives an opinion on something I care about? What could I learn? By the way … humility builds trust at an incredible rate … try it!

Working through and benefiting from adversity is a tall order. I am not pretending it’s easy to push through. No matter how many times a person faces difficult things, it does not necessarily make future problems easier. However, the committed learner will pick up tools each time adversity rears its ugly head to be better equipped for life and to help others along the way.

References

Brees, Drew (2010). Coming Back Stronger: Unleashing the hidden power of adversity. Carol Stream, IL. Tyndale House Publishers.

Friesen, Mike (2008). Expected End: What Culture Is, Why It Matters and How to Improve It. Adna, WA. Lulu Press.

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Coming Back Stronger | Drew Brees (1 of 2)

I am reading a great book by New Orleans Saints Quarterback, Drew Brees titled, “Coming Back Stronger.” (If you are challenged with your present circumstances, let me recommend Drew’s book to you.) In this book, Drew talks about the mysterious value of adversity and how, “that which doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.” (Brees, 2010) He draws from his real life examples and suggests ways of finding the good in bad things that may come from just living life.

One of the intriguing concepts in the book relates to Drew’s acrostic on faith. ‘Keeping the faith’ so to speak is one of the required mental processes to excel in adversity. From a team perspective, Drew breaks down faith into five pieces so here is the diagram.

Fortitude

Attitude

Integrity

Trust

Humility

Let’s look at each piece in more detail. (Please understand my thoughts below are mixed with Drew’s views from his book.)

Fortitude

One part of getting through difficult things is simple grit. There is more to it than this but a ‘never say die’ outlook makes a huge difference. Think about most anybody who succeeds whether in business, sports, school, etc. Having a great heart that keeps going is important. At times, pushing ahead seems to take sheer will and a mindset that will not give up or give in.

Many years ago when I was in Air Force Pilot Training, there were days when I just wasn’t having fun. Once the romance of flying jets disappeared, becoming qualified was a lot of work (just like anything else worth achieving). There were days where other more qualified, more talented student pilots washed out of the program for a variety of reasons and I often wondered if I would be next. It was during these hard times that a simple determination carried me. Graduation day was sweet indeed!

Ideas – What area of your life could use more fortitude? Is there something that looks tough where a better mindset of fortitude will help you push through to achievement or success? Are you taking responsibility in all ways so fortitude is just the natural outcome?

Attitude

It is one thing to persist in the face of difficulty but it’s quite another to do so with a positive attitude. While a positive attitude alone is not enough, a super attitude combined with other important pieces (such as fortitude) is a remarkable combination.

I believe it’s General Colin Powell who says, “Optimism is a force multiplier.” I take his quote to mean there is energy and motivation with optimism. A positive attitude linked with a clear-headed view of reality is powerful and contagious.

Ideas – What area in your life could use a boost from optimism? Are you persevering in something but doing so with a lousy attitude? How will an attitude improvement strengthen your resolve to succeed in spite of obstacles?

Integrity

Being and acting as an integrated, whole person is one key part of happiness. It is also the pre-work to having great personal and professional relationships. If I look good on the surface but have problems with my integrity, I will never enjoy relationships as I otherwise might.

An important concept in reaching higher to personal success is first doing the inner work. This is all about integrity. Over time, I cannot have one area of my life where I do right and another where I do wrong. I can’t compartmentalize my character. You and I are whole people. Think about this …

Let’s say a hypothetical person named Joe wakes up in the morning. He remembers how badly he treated one of his family members over the weekend and is holding  a grudge. Further, as he gets ready for work, he has a nasty argument with his wife due to selfishness and ego. How do you think Joe’s day will go at work? Will he be able to completely wall off his work life from his personal life day after day? Nobody is strong enough to compartmentalize this well.

This is why integrity is so important. If any of us wants a good life in one area, we must work to have a good life in all areas. This about living by timeless values and conscience. It’s about life-long satisfaction across the board. Working through adversity while improving integrity is a sure recipe for long-term success.

Ideas – How am I doing when nobody else is around? What areas could I improve by listening to my conscience more? What integrity advice would I receive from those I respect or love most?

Next time, we’ll look at adversity related to the last two areas of trust and humility.

Reference

Brees, Drew (2010). Coming Back Stronger: Unleashing the hidden power of adversity. Carol Stream, IL. Tyndale House Publishers.

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Coming Back Stronger | Drew Brees (2 of 2)